Hey ya’ll! Ever want a good laugh at a horribly \ written story ‘cause you’re bored and have nothing better to do? Look no more! I’ve decided to share the first (and only) volume of Silent Tears here on my blog for your entertainment.
The story was poorly planned and there wasn’t much character development. It was also written to be a comic script yet made in the style of a film script.
Just look at how much this story changed since 2008. (It started in a high school and not college).
A little about the story:
Minami Kyuki’s hearts a battle ground of despair. Faced with more difficulties in her life than the normal teen, Minami copes by living one day at a time. But how long before the tragic events of her past haunts her to her death?
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Also, as an added bonus, Silent Tears has a prologue and I made an animatic for it back in college. Not only has my writing and storytelling improved, but so has my art. This is so bad I have to share:
(Just know my Japanese sucked back in 2009. It's soooo much better now).
Side note, here is what I had in mind for the cover for the first volume. On the left was the original cover and on the right was the "special edition" version. Not sure what was going to be in the special edition besides a new cover but enjoy all the same!~ (Art by yours truly).
Chapter 1: The Unwanted Gift
EXT. SUGARMOUNT SENIOR HIGH SCHOOL FRONT DOORS
The sun is setting, showing a wonderful array of colors. Random
teens call their parents to come pick them up. MINAMI KYUKI,
KAYLA CONNERY, VENESSA and NATALIE DOUMONT are leaving the
school, all laughing and talking about their night. A banner
is held on top of the entrance saying: ‘Sugarmount Senior
High Talent Show!’
MINAMI KYUKI
(Narrative Bubble) How long
has it been?
MINAMI
Man! That competition was brutal
this year!
VANESSA DOUMONT
I’ll say. (To herself) And all they
got was a lame gift certificate.
NATALIE DOUMONT
It’s a good thing that magician
didn’t win. (To herself) I totally
saw that egg in his hand!
MINAMI smiles and laughs at her friends as they walk down
the steps.
MINAMI
(Narrative Bubble)That’s
right. Four years now. Four years
since my family was brutally
murdered.
MINAMI
Hey, I got to jet. My parental
units are expecting me home after
the show. Plus, I got to something
to do.
KAYLA CONNERY
Kay.
CU Minami
MINAMI
My name is MINAMI 'SOUTH’ KYUKI.
When I was only 12 years old, a
masked man came into my home and
took the lives of my entire family, making
me an orphan.
EXT. CAMPBELLTON
An aerial view of Campbellton.
MINAMI
(Narrative Bubble) Today was a
special day for me. It wasn’t
just the day of my school’s
talent show.
INT. MINAMI’S HOUSE
MINAMI enters her house. ANGIE, the family dog, greets her with
a lick and a bark. Two cats lay curled up on the couch where
LYNN sits. DENNIS sits in his rocking chair, next to the
couch.
MINAMI
I’m home!
MINAMI
(Narrative Bubble) No, it was
more than that.
DENNIS
Welcome home MINA!
LYNN
How was it?
MINAMI
Awesome! Say, I’m going to take a
shower, k?
LYNN
O.K. Don’t take too long.
MINAMI is seen walking up the stairs, waving her hand, not looking
back.
MINAMI
Of course! (Narrative Bubble) Today
was the anniversary of my parents
death.
INT. MINAMI’S HOUSE BATHROOM
MINAMI turns on the tap. MINAMI’s arms are forward on the wall,
supporting her weight, her head hung low, looking defeated.
CU of MINAMI’s face. Her eyes stare blankly at the floor.
MINAMI
(Narrative Bubble) No one
knows who the murderer was, but
he was said to have committed
suicide in the fire he
created.
INT. MINAMI’S HOUSE HER ROOM
MINAMI is seen dressed, drying her hair with a towel. A
large array of martial art trophies decorates her room. Several
swords hang from the wall and some drawings that MINAMI
herself had done were on the wall as well, by her desk.
MINAMI
(Narrative Bubble) But I know
the truth. I saw his face.
A flash back of when MINAMI used the scissors to cut the
man’s mask, showing a bit of his face. Flash back end. MINAMI
goes to a box by her bed and as she slowly picks it it, she
sits down on her bed. She opens it up slowly. Inside the box
contains a burnt nail, a burnt part of a newspaper, and a crumpled
picture with water marks showing tears have fallen on it.
MINAMI picks up each object one by one then she places them
carefully on her bed. The last one she picks up is the
crumpled picture. The picture shows a younger version of
MINAMI with her birth parents. A tear runs down her face.
MINAMI
I’m going to find him mom, dad. I
know he got out alive. I just know
it! And I’ll let the world know of
it too, just you watch.
MINAMI touches the picture softly as she speaks. She then places
the picture on her bed with the other objects, then looks up
at the ceiling, staring at nothing.
MINAMI
(Sigh) I want to see you so
bad. I know I have it good here
now, but I miss my friends, my
home back in Kobe. Oh mom,
dad. It hurts so bad….
MINAMI looks longingly at one of her sharpest blades. She closes
her eye’s and leans back.
MINAMI
<May you find peace.> I know I wont
until he pays….
EXT. CAMPBELLTON
Next morning. MINAMI is seen running to school.
MINAMI
Snaps! I’m going to be late! Sleep
through that darn alarm again!
3 figures emerge from the shadows as MINAMI runs by. DEREK
BEYIT smiles sinisterly. MARK STAGGER and TYLER BUTTLER
laugh.
DEREK BEYIT
Hey! You!
MARK STAGGER
Japanese chick!
MINAMI stops in her tracks, nearly falls over, and
MINAMI
Hiya.
MINAMI turns to leave, but TYLER BUTTER reaches into his bag and
pulls out and egg, then throws it at her. The egg hit’s
MINAMI in the back of the head. MINAMI turns around, arms in
the air in disgust.
DEREK
My name is DEREK. This is TYLER and
MARK.
TYLER BUTTLER
And we got a problem
MINAMI
You darn right we do. What the hell
was that for? (To herself) Jerks.
(Narrative Bubble) Something isn’t
right here….
DEREK
MARK here tells me it’s your
birthday this Thursday. How old you
going to be? 17?
MINAMI
<Screw you> I’m off.
She turns to leave.
DEREK
Well, since were nice guys, we got
you a birthday present.
MARK
Something from the heart.
MARK smiles as he speaks. MINAMI answers, her back facing
the teenage boys.
MINAMI
Don’t care.
DEREK looks at MARK and TYLER. They all pick up eggs from their
backpacks and throw them at MINAMI. MINAMI stumbles.
MARK
We’re still talking to you stupid
Japanese!
DEREK picks up a rock, tosses it in the air then throws it
at MINAMI.
DEREK
Happy Birthday! (Laughs)
MARK and TYLER both do the same as DEREK.
TYLER
And this is forever coming into
OUR country!
TYLER throws his rock, hitting MINAMI in the arm.
MARK
And this is for being alive!
The rock hits her in the chest.
MINAMI
(Narrative Bubble)What’s
happening to me? Why are they hitting
me this way?
The boys continue to throw rocks at her. MINAMI goes to kick them,
but a rock hits her on the head, knocking her down. MARK
then picks up a glass bottle from the ground then hits
MINAMI with it over the head, sending her to the ground.
MINAMI stops moving and doesn’t get up.
TYLER
What the heck did you do that for?
We agreed just to play around with
her a bit! Not to kill her!
DEREK
I don’t think she’s dead.
MARK
Well what do we do with her?
DEREK smiles.
DEREK
Same as the last boys.
CU of MARK and TYLER, looking confused.
INT. CAMPBELLTON AN OLD ABANDONED HOUSE
MINAMI is seen lying on the basement floor in the dark, bleeding.
DEREK, MARK, and TYLER are talking outside the door.
DEREK
(Muffled) She’ll be fine.
Let’s hurry before were late for
MR LANDRYS class again.
A figure, shrouded in darkness, slowly advances towards MINAMI.
The figure goes to reach MINAMI.
MINAMI
Urg….